gained 3-4lbs over xmas!! cw = 96ish lbs FAILURE!!!!!!!!
Merry Christmas everyoneeee! x
hey just posted progress pics in my lj ..could be triggering though. check em out =]
Hope everyone's okay!Christmas in 5 days. Insane!Dreading the food so much though.Haha it's funny, I've already started to think of new years resolutions. Will post them nearer new year.Weight's still 10 stone/140 lbs. At least i haven't gained because i've been eating so much.Will keep you updated!Love XO
Sorry I haven't updated in ages. I've been so busy.I haven't weighed myself in a while because i've got family round (more family is coming at the weekend) so I haven't been able to get to the scales. Also it's much harder to get out of meals when you have family round. Which sucks.Going to start restricting properly in january.Had a HORRIBLE dream last night when i weighed 12 stone 12/180 lbs. God I was so friggin scared!Hope you're all doing much better than I am. Love x
I hate how full of bullshit my parents are. They never listen to me. I can't wait until I can leave home and leave this mess.
My tutor came today for maths and i broke down crying in front of him. I'm so fucking embarrassed.I was just like 'I am so sorry, i'm just really tired' and he was like Oh its fine, but he was obviously feeling really awkward. Reasons why i broke down.1. I didn't get any sleep lastnight.2. I was up at 4 this morning to exercise till 7.3. I keep gaining weight.4. My dad expects so much from me.5. I had a fight with my mum before i saw my tutor about how 'lazy' i am.6. I'm sick.7. I ate way too much last night.8. One of my friends who i see loads is avoiding me and i don't know why.9. I have to be perfect for everyone.10. I'm never good enough.I feel so embarrased and so fucking awful.
Trying not to weigh myself until wednesday.It's funny. I've gone from weighing myself once a week to 3-4 times a day.Also, I think mum's starting to notice my lack of eating and stuff. She has this look on her face. Going to eat infront of her a bit more, put her mind at ease.Hope i'll lose by wednesday. 18 days till xmas! I'm well excited, not looking forward to xmas dinner though. It'll be my second 'skinny' christmas. Everyone always gets be chocolate which I hate. That reminds me, my godfather who died about a month ago, got me and my older sister advent calenders before he died. So far I haven't eaten any, but i'm not sure what to do with them. Any help????x
Weighed myself today, maintained.Have to have a roast later but going to walk the dog and do more exercise.Mum got really angry with me this morning saying i hadn't eating breakfast blah blah blah. So i had to have muesili. Hope it won't make me gain.
So tried apple cider viningar. 1-2 teaspoons in a glass of water and it works! It's definitely works if you don't want to feel hungry.Also, another tip i've found which works well is putting a stock cube in 400 mls of water and its only 7 calories! And it tastes good!Had 335 cals so far, done about 30 mins of exercise. Will do 30 mins more later. Hopefully will weigh less tomorrow.Mum's making me have tea tonight which i guess will be about 550 calories. So i will have consumed 885 cals which is ok. Still under 1000.Hope everyone's doing alrightyyy!x